Thoughts

Struggling through the week 

This week has been a struggle. I am tired, not feeling great and it seems as though I am limping in a bad mood to the finishing line that is the end of term. At times like this I question everything and have a tendency to get stuck into a downward spiral that leads towards my box but I am pleased to say that I have given myself permission this week to just be a bit melancholy and so far that has really helped. 

Every day I get up and set my intention for the day and one of the recurring themes is to take care of my body and eat well but honestly this has not been going great this week. I am in one of those periods with food when nothing seems appealing aside from junky food that you don’t have to prepare. For a long time this would have been the catalyst for disastrous eating that only makes me feel worse. I am happy to report, however, that even though there is lots of room for improvement in terms of nutrition, things have not gone as awry as perhaps they would have done not that long ago. 

Even though this week has been a struggle and even though I am feeling rather blue, I am proud of the progress I have made and continue to make every single day. Living with mental illness is an ongoing battle and of course as in any battle there are small victories and losses to be celebrated and endured. Learning to accept this has made a massive difference to my life and brings peace even when things don’t feel as though they are going as I would like. If you are reading this and connect with what I am trying to clumsily convey, please know that if you just keep going things can and will get better.

As always, it helps me to turn to gratitude. I am grateful to be still here and trying everyday to become who I aspire to be. I am grateful for small steps in the direction I am heading, grateful for love, grateful for grace and grateful for peace and acceptance. I am grateful to be me. 

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